Tag Archives: Valentine’s Day

11 reasons it pays to be single on Valentine’s Day

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In honour of the upcoming Never-you-mind-my-relationship-status Day, here are my personal top eleven reasons on why Valentine’s Day is better for the singles.

  1. You get to have the house all to yourself. While your flatmates are out with their significant others you get to have a three hour long bubble bath with no one trying to break the door.
  2. You save money: no one to expect extravagant gifts means your budget might just get you through the month.
  3. No pre-date nerves of the “Ohmygoshwhattowearvariety”.
  4. Ladies: if you want to be lazy and NOT shave your legs, no one will know.
  5. No struggle to fit yet-another plushy to your already alarmingly large collection.
  6. If you want to have a junk food night in, washed down with a tub of Ben and Jerries, there’s bound to be someone on your friends list to join you.
  7. No embarrassingly sappy posts on Facebook/Twitter that you know you will regret in a few weeks’ time.
  8. You don’t have to sit through a movie you hate and pretend to like it for your date’s sake.
  9. Better yet! You don’t have to share your popcorn!
  10. You don’t lose sight of what’s important: specifically the upcoming Pancake Day.
  11. Massive chocolate clearance on every supermarket on the 15ht.

P.S. Kudos to the Nostalgia Critic for the Top 11 gimmick.

N is for Naughty and Nice

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Dear Santa,

…I can explain? Um, thing is, I’m not sure on which end of the spectrum I’m on this year…. I tried to be nice (mostly) but I couldn’t help finding that naughty was more fun. It’s not my fault, not really. People just don’t get me. And I know I have anger issues, but I’ve been working on it, I swear! So what if I blew up the downtown bank again? It’s practically a seasonal requirement by now, and anyway that queue was taking far too long. And the department store robbery? I’ve been short on cash and with so many henchmen and evil minions to buy presents for, I found that I had to look into alternative methods of shopping. The hallucinogen mince pies were an accident, I admit. I was going to save that for Valentine’s Day. Now I’ll just have to settle for truth serum-laced chocolates. As for my non-seasonal activities, they are all part of my job. And if you ask my army of doom, they only have good things to say for me! I made sure of it. So, could you maybe, just this once, stretch the definition of nice? I would really like a new death ray for my secret headquarters. And possibly a brownie tray. I’ve been baking far too much for the recruitment fairs.

Sincerely,

E.O.

(Evil Overlady)